Poet's Corner: Places, Loved Ones by Phillip Larkin

[stonepicnicking_okapi]

Places, Loved Ones by Philip Larkin

No, I have never found
The place where I could say
This is my proper ground,
Here I shall stay;
Nor met that special one
Who has an instant claim
On everything I own
Down to my name;

To find such seems to prove
You want no choice in where
To build, or whom to love;
You ask them to bear
You off irrevocably,
So that it's not your fault
Should the town turn dreary,
The girl a dolt.

Yet, having missed them, you're
Bound, none the less, to act
As if what you settled for
Mashed you, in fact;
And wiser to keep away
From thinking you still might trace
Uncalled-for to this day
Your person, your place.

Comments

[firecat]

I love this. I'm always struggling with how to be a romantic and not a romantic at the same time.

The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless and yet be determined to make them otherwise. -- F. Scott Fitzgerald, _The Crack-up_ [1936]

(I don't believe that it has that much to do with intelligence, but it's an important ability, wherever it comes from.)

[stonepicnicking_okapi]

Ah, that's an interesting quote. I think it comes down to seeing an issue on all sides, philosophically speaking, which I think it is a mature practice.

But as far as romance, I don't know, at the moment, I am thinking of it like a tentacle monster, something that I enjoy ruminating on to great detail in theory (and in fic!) but if I actually ran into one, I might not be keen (but I'd probably go along with it for curiosity's sake!). There is commercial romance (flowers and chocolates) then there is sort of popular romance but even that has a tendency to irk me. I don't think I'm a romantic, but then I do write a decent amount of romantic fluff so :/

[firecat]

Yeah, I need to come up with a different way to describe what I currently call romantic. It doesn't have much to do with flowers and chocolates and Harlequin novels. But a tentacle monster does come close.

[stonepicnicking_okapi]

Ha! I think it's easy to dismiss Harlequin romance, but I find let's call it Hallmark romance to be more insidious and more problematic for me. I like the idea of reclaiming bit of Harlequin romance (sort of like the Unconventional Courtship challenge does where you take a summary of a Harlequin novel and write a fanfic for it) but there is another kind of romance that I can't think of a good real life example of right now but Hallmark films which is sort of like old school Disney princess, too, in its own way. I still feel like I'm being sold a bill of goods but it's more difficult for me to articulate why.

But yay for tentacle monsters!!

[firecat]

Yes, Hallmark romance is a better term for the "bill of goods."

I agree with reclaiming romance as a genre and am hoping I can find time to do Unconventional Courtship. I've already been having fun with the extremely entertaining plot generator they linked — http://www.seasip.info/Misc/ucrpg.html

[stonepicnicking_okapi]

Yeah, like yesterday I was watching the TV show Midsomer Murders (do you know it) on imdb and there was a commercial for shaving gel that is raspberry & cream scented and there were comely legs in a shower of raspberries and I was appalled (but slightly appreciate of the comely legs) and I had that being sold a bill of goods on many levels feeling but I don't know have the right words to explain it. Like shaving is a thing and using sex and fruit to sell shaving and just a bizarre feeling in the chest and brain.

That generator is very funny! I am going to do an The Old Guard AU where Joe inherits Nicky as part of his late half-brother Jafar's estate but is Nicky a monk or a concubine! Or both! I haven't decided yet.

[firecat]

I have yet to pick up Midsomer Murders but it's been recommended many times by people I trust, so it's on my list. Once I get through all the stuff by the two Toms, LOL.

I vote for both!

I shut my attention down fast and hard whenever I see legs in raspberries, however comely, because it never ends well. It's always about shaving gel in the end!